"What Is Coaching?"
Imagine that you're already perfect
What if being human is a naturally thriving condition, rather than a faulty one? Let's start there.
You're perfect. You have everything you need. You have the wisdom, the knowledge, the intuition. You're not your "personality." Your past doesn't define what you can do today or going forward. You don't have to believe you're "the type of person who . . . ". You can trust yourself. You don't have to struggle. Your natural state is to create; to go out into the day and experience fulfillment, purpose and belonging. You don't have to struggle and work yourself into an existential lather to make a change or transform your ways, your life. Whatever you want, whoever you want to be, however you want to feel can happen starting today.
This is how I approach working with you. Your natural state is to thrive, so let's look at the thinking that is keeping you from what you want. It's not your job or the overbearing boss or a project that's run past deadline or a creative block or a company in turmoil that's responsible for your less-than-ideal life. It's your thinking. And that's what you're going to take on and play with together. This will be the game changer that will transform everything.
Together, we'll create a coaching experience filled with discovery, curiosity, surprise, adventure as well as a state of ease, relaxation and fun.
As your coach, I am:
A partner, travel companion, support system and champion. Someone who deeply cares about your ambitions, goals, desires and daily life experiences--and believes in your natural ability to do and be your heart's desire. I will tell you the truth, act as a mirror, and serve as a guide. I will challenge your limiting views and listen with all my might. I will shine a light on what you can't see--SHAZAM--so life gets bigger!
If you are my client, you are MY POSSE. In other words, you are with me and on my mind as I navigate through my own days. If I come across a blog article, video, podcast, book, quote, movie, artist--anything I think serves your goals and desires, I will share it with you so you can keep moving in the direction you want to be.
I AM THERE FOR YOU: Accessible in between coaching calls via email, text or phone in case you need some spot coaching or you were visited by a WHAT NOW work situation and need a pow-wow. When the whispers of doubt kick up because they will; when the siren songs of "I can't" or "who do you think you're kidding?" or "it's too hard" cycle on to replay, I am there to remind you that these thoughts aren't the truth and to keep going, keep GOING, KEEP GOING! Our survival brain is so good at luring us off the path, we need a support system to remind us that playing the big game is where we are meant to be.
An example of how coaching works with thoughts
Imagine going on a guided tour of your mind
Let's say your mind looks like a city plan, with main streets and avenues and side roads everywhere. This circuitry represents the thoughts you've built for yourself over your life. Like fast moving traffic in a big city, your thoughts are moving at rapid-fire speed--you have over 60,000 of them a day! And a lot of these thoughts are negative because your reptilian brain is still in survival mode, keeping you safe from the Wooly Mammoths.
This is why so many of us have minds filled with thoughts such as: "I"m over my head in this situation"; or, I'll never find a job I like" or "I could never have the guts to do that" to "nobody gets me," and a good ol' simple "this sucks." Your fight-or-flight brain is trying to keep you safe and away from change. Our world has progressed a thousand-fold; our brain hasn't quite caught up. So when we challenge ourselves to go into uncharted territory, to follow a deep desire (start a business, step into a managerial role, start that book), the mind kicks up doubt, and that doubt grows babies, and if we're not careful, those bold visions stall out, get put on hold or (even worse) never get realized at all.
This is where coaching comes in!
In coaching, we take a good look at the roadways of your habitual thinking. We consider all the ways your thoughts set off feelings, actions and results in your life. We transform the relationship you have with your thinking life, so you can achieve your impossible goals, live with a greater sense of calm and contentment and know how to live in relationship with the assembly line of your daily incoming thoughts--in harmony.
Some coaching philosophy
- Your reality is defined by your thoughts. Events and circumstances are neutral. They're information; data. It's how you respond to each piece of data that creates a thought that trips a feeling, defines your reality and life result.
- You're perfect. Imagine that your natural state is peace, confidence, creativity, kindness, following your heart, being OK with all the thoughts and feelings swirling around inside you, confident that none of them define you or your fate. Sound too good to be true?
- Being stuck is often the state of imprisoning yourself to old stories. Just as a story is written, it can be re-written. And consider this: What if you moved beyond story? What if you let your past wash off you as if you are a duck, your stories just water. There, and then POOF, gone.
- A feeling is not the truth. You might feel like the last five years of your life were disappointing; you might feel like the company doesn't respect you; you might feel emptied of all creative inspiration--but it’s just a feeling. NOT the truth. You don’t have to let a feeling own you.
- A thought isn't the truth either. It's just a reaction to a circumstance--which is data. Neutral content. You can decide what kind of thoughts you want to have--positive, neutral or negative. You can decide to detach from all thoughts and con
- It’s in our nature to be creative. Being “creative” isn't about standing with an easel in the French countryside. Creativity is expansive! We are creative in how we work a complex spreadsheet; break a family pattern to make a better life for ourselves; start a business; build relationships and community; create a laugh among friends, you name it. Creative expression gives life purpose, meaning and joy. And being creative also helps move roadblocks so you can get to where you want to go, being the person you want to be.
- You Can Do It. This is a bedrock of the coaching partnership. I will believe in you even when you’re not so sure—because sometimes that’s what we all need. You don't have to go it alone. There's a village of people eager to support your rise to greatness, too.
If you want to see what coaching is like email me!
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